A FOLLOW-UP AND SOME OBSERVATIONS

("Don't try to do it, Don't try to kill your time..You might do it...You've got to hold onto your time and break through these times of trouble." - Temple Of The Dog)

I was a bit busy last week doing some research after being very moved by last week's episode of Intervention on the A&E Network. This was an episode that chronicled an 18 year old girl named Corrine and her struggles with a Heroin addiction. After watching the documentary I was curious to see what was being done in my community and in surrounding areas to prevent drug abuse among kids. To say that the effort being put forth especially by my town, (Swampscott, Mass.) is dissapointing, would be an understatement.

I figured I would start my research by going right to the source. What better way to find out about what type of emphasis is put on childhood drug addiction then asking someone who is in school. So this week I asked my 10 year old Niece what if any drug education she and her classmates get in her Elementary School in Salem, Ma. According to my Niece, some of the health programs were eliminated at her school due to budget cuts, and due to the fact that a heavy emphasis is being placed on the MCAS Exam (a Math and English, and Science test which is a graduation requirement for all students beginning in the sixth grade). Other than having a couple of Salem Police Officers come for a discussion, no mention has been made about the dangers of drugs in my Niece's 5th Grade class. From what she told me, the classroom visit by the Officer mainly consisted of "safety discussions" ( what to do, and who to go to in the case of an emergency), although drug use was mentioned briefly during the talk, to best of her recollection. I plan on doing further investigating of the Salem Schools, so I will withhold any further judgment.

The preceeding was the good news. After looking into some efforts in my hometown, I came away very dissapointed and a bit concerned for what the future may hold. The opinion I got from some authorities on the subject is that efforts to add to the resources used to combat drug use among kids is falling on deaf ears, and what is currently available may not last through the next budget negotiations next month.

A former English teacher of mine recently moved into my apartment building ( our stories form the "old days" are classic), and we often have lobby discussions on the current state of the local school system. He is a current member of the School Committee and after I informed him of my interest in this subject, he invited me to attend last Thursday's meeting with him, and I took him up on the offer. Here is what is being proposed among other things, for the next fiscal year (which beigins July 1st) :

1. Eliminating Health courses from the 5th through the 8th Grades.
2. Decreasing Health resources at the High School level (no details provided)
3. Eliminating the School Resource Officer

Sadly, these proposals come as no surprise to those in education cirlces in town, and are the result of hard budget choices, due to the fact that we live in a town with a small business tax base, thus the tax burden falls on the individual homeowners. These cuts also have to do with funding being diverted from other areas to deal with preperation for the MCAS (the state-wide aptitude exam which is a requirement for graduation), as well as helping those that have failed the test. The benefits and/or problems with this test can be argued for days, so all I will say is that it was predicted years ago that this exam would eat up too much school resources, but the Powers that Be ignored these warnings, and this is the result.

The areas that will potentially recieve decreases were intriguing, as were these proposals:


1. An increase of funding for the athletic budget.
2. A search committee (costing close to 1 million dollars), assigned to secure advertising signage accounts for the soon-to-be completed High School.

As with the previous list, none of this is set in stone, butsome things stuck out here. Granted, all athletic programs were almost eliminated totally last year (and would have been if not for some creative fund raising on the part of the School Committee members, as well as some town Selectmen), and the advertising search is the sad result of the fact that education is very low on the townwide priority list - thus the need for outside, nontraditional revenue streams - , which is a shame unto itself. Having said all of that, something about these proposals strikes me as a serious misallocation of resources.

The point regarding the School Resource Officer is worth expanding on. I graduated with, and am still friendly with the current officer. I talked to him at last week's meeting, and he told me that he has been able to get some kids help for substance addiction as a result of his work at the High School. The very reason an officer was brought in to begin with, was to deal with alcohol and drug problems that have affected the School community during the last few years. he said something else that gets to the heart of this whole problem. "They want to save money everywhere they can, and I have to respect that.", he said. "But have any of these people calculated how much it will cost the entire town and state for that matter, if these drug and alcohol problems continue?", he asked. "You can't put a price on saving a kid's life," he continued.

This situation is not confined to Swampscott, Ma. School systems all around the state and country, are grappling with the same issues. It seems more and more like everything except the bare essentials are being cut from schools everywhere. This "amateur" research has also led me to another conclusion. The whole "Just Say No" mantra from the 1980's was a joke. We need to tell kids WHY they should say no, and that takes education. Even education alone may not be enough to solve this problem, and we may not solve it in our lifetime, but I believe if we can just reach one kid, then that will make a difference. Won't it?

A POWERFUL REMINDER TO STAY CLEAN

( " He came from and island, and he died from the street..and he hurt so bad, like a soul breaking, but he never said nothing to me.")

I am not a big TV watcher and I never really have been. Other than sporting events or movies, I view Network TV as nothing more than a barren wasteland, designed to insult our intelligence. I have no desire to watch people eating bugs, and I also believe that a recording contract should be the reward of hard work NOT WINNING A CONTEST. I do realize however, with ratings shares being lost to Cable TV, the networks have been eager to cut production costs which has led to the onslaught of "reality shows" over the last 5 - plus years (the shows themselves are easy to produce, as all you need are people and a camera).

Having said that, this past Sunday evening I caught an episode of "Intervention" on the A& E Network. This is a documentary show that depicts people dealing with such issues as drug and gambling addictions, and the toll it takes on their families. Faced with no other option, the families call in a professional Interventionist. I had read some good reviews about the show and have been meaning to tune in for awhile. If the other episodes are as powerful as Sunday's, this show will be a regular entry into my Tivo. I don't think I have ever had a TV show hit me as hard as this one did.

Episode 14 dealt with an 18 year old girl named Corrine, a drug addict hooked on a deadly, combustible combination of Heroin and Crystal Meth. ( for those not familiar, Heroin is a depressant, Crystal Meth is a stimulant. Mixing the two gives an addict a "speedball" effect, something akin to a drug induced "rollercoaster" feeling.) To make matters worse, she is a diabetic and has been neglecting her Insulin treatments in favor of her addiction. Perhaps it is the Diabetis connection (my father was a Diabetic), or the fact that I have a young Niece who will be 11 in November, but I am not quite sure what it was about her story that hit me so hard. I volunteered at a drug treatment facility in high school as part of a work-release program my Senior year, and took health courses concerning addiction. Maybe that is it. Perhaps it is the fact that a very good friend of mine whom I played Softball with years ago had a bad drinking problem (and we suspected a drug problem as well). All I know is when the episode was over, I was almost to the point of tears.

The girl's background is much the same as millions of other kids all around the country. Honor roll student, scholar/athlete, from a very loving family. However, when Corrine was in the 7th grade she was sexually abused by a babysitter, and that is where things began to go downhill quickly. As as she was entering high school Corrine's parent's relationship ran into problems (the show is vauge as to exactly what the marital problems were, but when the documentary was being filmed her parents were together by all indications). This led to the inevitable adolescent depression and alienation. Having moved to a new town in Missouri as she began high school, Corrine made new friends that introduced her to drugs.

The transformation from "girl next door" to addict during the course of the episode is shocking. It is not so much her physical appearance that undergoes a transformation, but just her overall outlook on life. Home movies are shown of her on vacations with her family, playing with her younger sister. Then we see her taking a shot of Heroin before her mother picks her up for a visit to her Grandmother's house. It is during this scene where Corrine says something that literally made my heart sink. As she is waiting for her mother to arrive at her house ( a basement room that she shares wither her boyfriend, where just about every waking hour is spent doing drugs), Corrine says "My only wish, if I keep feeling this way, mentally and physically, is that I die soon." Call me nieve, but I could not believe it. Here is a girl with her whole life in front of her, that wants to die at the age of 18.

The scene at her Grandmother's house is equally as powerful. After awhile it becomes obvious that Corrine is under the influence, and her and her mother have an argument about the visit being ruined. Inside the house her Grandmother makes a tearful plea that "she wants her angel back". It is here that Corrine allows a brief glimpse of what she is feeling, and the battle that all drug addicts wage. she says to her grandmother that "there have been times over the past few years that I have wanted to call and talk to you but I didn't feel worth it." When asked why she says " I don't know, somewhere along the line, I just started to hate the world."

From there, the actual intervention process is depicted. Corrine thinks she is going to be reuinited with a friend that she has not seen in over a year, but when she arrives at the hotel where her friend is staying, her family is in the room along with the interventionist. Corrine then comes face to face with her problem and the pain it is causing her loved ones. Then she agrees to seek counseling.

The documentary has a bit of a sad ending as well. After entering into a treatment program in Mesa Arizona, Corrine appears to be making progress, but soon is asked to leave the program for violating house rules (coming home drunk). She enters another treatment center, and has a relapse of her Heroin addiction. A tough way to end a very powerful and gripping story.


Having watched this program it has brought home to me the importance of discussing things like drug addiction with kids, even when they are very young. It IS important to let them know that they can come to the adults in their life if they have a problem, or if they are confused about something. Keep the lines of communication open, that is what all of the P.S.A.'s say. (TALKING: THE ANTI-DRUG, as the commercial says). However, after watching this program I came away confused. I wonder if all of these "Anti-Drug" Advisories", all of the classes, symposiums, and Dooms Day scenarios that we put in kid's heads are working. I could be wrong, but I'm sure this girl took much the same health classes that we all took in school. Perhaps I am mistaken, but I am quite positive there were teachers and other adults who urged her to stay away from drugs. So, what happened? How did a child go from loving life, to wanting to die? This is the question that I keep asking myself, and that we should all ask. Peace.

A TRIP TO SOME OLD STOMPING GROUNDS...AND THINGS ARE SURE NOT WHAT THEY USED TO BE

I now know the true meaning of the statement " you can never go home again". The essence of the saying came to me loud and clear last Thursday as I attended the Boston Bruins Vs. Montreal Canadiens game at the TD BankNorth Garden. Having the day off and seeing as I have not attended a game in about two years ( this of my own choice, but more on that later) and looking for a bit of a change of pace, I decided to head into the Garden to pick up a ticket. For the purpose of my newly rediscovered writing hobby (thanks to this blog), I also decided to bring along a small notebook and jot down a few observations during my experience.

At this point I feel it is necessary to give a quick backgound on this story. I have been a huge hockey fan all of my life, it has been in my blood almost since birth. Boston Bruins games were the first sporting events that I recall watching as a little kid growing up (although we watched every sport that was in season in our house), and I have lived and died with the Black and Gold for most of my life. During the late 80's and early 90's, The Garden was the center of my sports universe. Many a memorable Thursday and Saturday night was spent watching the likes of Cam Neely, Ray Bourque, and Andy Moog bring the old 'barn' to life. A co-worker of mine and I shared season tickets for few years and we would plan our work schedules around the games.

These days the passion is, in the words of the late Red Sox announcer Ned Martin, "long gone and hard to find." Although my love of hockey will always be with me, I just cannot get excited about the Bruins the way I used to. The energy that would fill the old Boston Garden on most game nights is a thing of the past, having been replaced by the carnival atmosphere of the new arena. Of course, these changes are not news to anyone that follows Boston Sports. The Bruins have been on a downward spiral for the better part of 10 years now, and they are way past the point of irrelevancy( TOMMOROW'S ASSIGNMENT: ask a co-worker if he or she can name you four players on the current Bruins roster). Despite all of this I have not realized how bad things have gotten...until now.

I arrived at the entrance gate in the North Station concourse at about 6:35, ticket in hand, and ready for my "trip down memory lane". There I was, set for a Bruins/Canadiens matchup in early March. 15 years ago, the hockey world would have stopped for a meeting ofthese two Original Six rivals, but on this night it felt like just another contest, in just another mediocre season. Other than me I counted about 15 other people waiting to get in. There were still tickets to be had at the Box Office, which pretty much assured that the attendance would be low, atleast compared to the standards of the Bruins/ Canadiens rivalry. ( That morning I asked the person whom I bought the ticket from at the Box Office how the game had sold. He laughed and said "you can pick your seat tonight". I got 5 dollars of the price of my ticket because March 9th was a designated 'Family Discount Night', and I could have gotten the ticket discounted further if I had a college I.D. Draw your own conclusions from that evidence.)

At 6:42 the gates opened and we all made our way up the escalators towards the seating areas. As I am taking in all that is around me I have a line in my head from the Mighty Mighty Bosstones song "I Want My City Back", in which lead singer Dicky Barrett says "Things are not the same as how I left them, when I left them." The building is the same (other than the name), but something was missing, something did not seem right. Anyone that has been to a high school reunion probably knows what I am talking about. It is that feeling where you know that before the night is out you will probably see things and interact with people that will depress you to no end, but you paid for your ticket so the best you can do is try to enjoy yourself. That is how it felt. This feeling would be with me throughout the entire game.

I reached my seat about 6:50PM, and 6:55, a NESN add came on the Jumbotron. This is the one that we have all seen a hundred times this year, in which Dennis Leary gives his impassioned speech: "It is the spirit felt in the streets, and heard in the bars...it's about the Cup...Now get to work!". Very good stuff from Leary except it is followed by the announcer's voice saying: "Passion, Courage...It's Called Bruins!!" Seriously, who writes their stuff? As if "Good Guys, Great Game" was not bad enough a few years ago, now we have this? I have a tag line for the Bruins: "Under-achievement, bad trades, poor management, lousy ownership...It's Called Mediocrity!!!" ( A co-worker of mine and I also came up with the three F's: Failure, Frustration, and Futility, but I only like to bring that one out on special occasions) Oh well, the night is young.


The puck was dropped at 7:10PM and as I looked arounnd as the puck was dropped, by pre-game suspicions of low attendence were right on the money. The opening period was uneventful, with some good open-ice skating (since this was my first game this year, it was also my first opportunity to view all of the rule changes up-close). The new rules have opened things up considerably, and as I am watching the first few minutes unfold I could not help but think of the damage that someone like Cam Neely could have done under these circumstances. Despite the fact that he would have put up frightening numbers in the current game, one of the fun things to watch when Cam played was his ability to fight through the neutral-ice contact from the opposing defensemen. Of course this is a lost art in today's NHL, a byproduct of Hockey's Nuclear winter of 2004-2005.

The game remained scorless until 6:48 of the second period when Alexi Kovalev netted a power play goal, the result of Milan Jurcina having been sent to the box for hooking just 26 seconds earlier. The Bruins defense can be summed up on one word: PATHETIC, with Nick Boynton being the sole bright spot. Watching these guys kill penalties is equally painful. Where have you gone Ray Bourque? Or give me Dave Poulin (One of the greatest defensive forwards I have ever seen). Hell, I'll take the (P..J.)Axelsson, (Tim)Taylor, and (Rob) Dimaio line that was excellent at killing penalties under Pat Burns.

At 16:13 of the middle period we got our first REAL crowd noise, and not the canned enthusiasm that the annoying Jumotron generates. Hall Gill and Claude Rivet hooked up in a nice little bout while it lasted ( it was quickly broken up by the referees, and for the record Rivet was the winner on my score-card). Nick Boynton entered the scrum that had developed and speared Marc Ribiero, which led to Boynton being tossed. The end result gave the Canadiens an extra 5 minute power play. Somehow the Bruins PK unit survived, although Montreal let them off the hook when Mathieu Dandenault was whistled for tripping at 19:59 of the second.

Into the third period we went with the crowd drifting back into its slumber, only to be woken up every now and then by the Jumbotron imploring the crowd to push the loudness meter to "Garden Level". Right. We were treated to another penalty killing clinic at 7:12 when Boston's David Tanabe was sent off for holding. Six seconds later Sheldon Souray ofthe Habs cashed in a gift wrapped 2 on 1 along with Saku Koivu for a 2-0 lead which for all intents and purposes, put the game away. As PA Announcer Jim Martin announced the goal, many people were seen headed for the exits, and garbage time was officially underway. Thomas Piekanec added an empty-net goal at 19:35 and 25 seconds later the horn sounded, officially ending the contest (although it was really over long before that). After the empty-netter, a quote from former Bruins assistant coach Tom McVie came into my head. After bad games or blowouts McVie used to say,"That was the type of game where they should let everyone in for free and have them pay to get out."

In all seriousness I did have a good time (despite the loss), but I have come to the conclusion that the "circus environment" in the Garden is officially too much for me to take. Perhaps it is just me getting older, although I realize these things are more noticable when the team is losing. Knowing these points, let me just state: I DON'T NEED A SCOREBOARD TO TELL ME WHEN TO CHEER!!!!! All I need is the score, the shots on net, the time of the period, some out of town scores, and maybe a video montage or two put to music. I don't need the stupid "Noise Meter", or the camera scanning the crowd looking for people acting stupid. All I need or want is the game. Having attended a few Patriots games over the last few years I have noticed that Gillette Staduim does not have half the "bells and whistles" that the BankNorth Garden has, for the simple fact that with the Patriots the game sells itself.

Other than being offered free tickets I don't see myself attending another game this season. I have a busy work schedule and the Bruins don't play many game on my days off for the remainder of the season. If things continue as the are - and we have no reason to believe anything will change - the Bruins will miss the playoffs. The Red Sox will begin their regular season soon, and thus the attention of the average Boston sports fan soon will be elsewhere. Hockey will end for the season in mid-April. In many ways Hockey ended a long time ago in Boston, atleast compared to how things used to be, and that is the sad part. Very sad indeed.

A DISCLOSURE, AND SOME ISSUES THAT NEED TO BE DISCUSSED

( In the interest of disclosure, let me begin today by stating publicly that I WAS WRONG about Manny Ramirez. He DID appear at Spring training ontime, and APPEARS to be content to stay in Boston, atleast for the time being. As much as it pains me , I will give credit where it is due and state for the record that Manny Ramirez was a man of his word. How long this tranquility lasts is anyone's guess - and with Ramirez, his attitude changes like New England weather - but for now things appear to be okay, until the next bump in the road.)

That minor issue out of the way, it is on to more important things. It is not often that I use this space to comment on issues in my personal life. My reasons for this are 1: I simply don't believe that my life is really that interesting, and 2. I don't wish to seem like so many other people that post on blogs such as Livejournal, who seem to use these forums for no other purpose but to vent. This is their perogative, but it is just not the type of thing that I wish to engage in. Today I am going to make an exception because there are issues that have arisen between a friend of mine (or someone who used to be a friend) and I, which I need to address. For the purpose of this posting, the said individual with whom I have this sudden disagreement will be known as SK. I believe my good friend Smokin Steve knows of whom I speak. Let me further state that within the last two days I have made repeated attempts to meet with this individual face to face to discuss our differences, but my requests have fallen on deaf ears. What follows is a synposis of the whole situation as I see it.

My friendship with SK goes back about four years, as his group of friends and mine used to meet at the same sports bar every month to watch the WWE Pay-Per-Views. After both groups realized that we had some things in common, we decided to exchange phone numbers, E-Mail addresses, etc. and pretty soon we were all hanging out regularly. Our monthly meetings at the Good Time Emporium in Somerville, Ma. for the Pay-Per-Views became legendary, as Smokin Steve can attest. One of our favorite traditions at these monthly gatherings was to shout out the names of obscure wrestlers, as if we were ring announcers. This always led to many laughs and made our group "the life of the party" so to speak. Honestly, I have had some staff members of the Emporuim tell me how amusing they find our antics, and how it "does not seem the same" during times when we have not been there. True story.

Over the course of the last few years SK and I have had our share of disagreements, but no issues that don't come up in any other friendship. There was not any major problems as far as I was concerned, until now that is. As I look back, if I had to pick out one thing that was troubling from my perspective it was SK's lack of basic common sense. (this has presented itself as a problem within the past week, but I will get to that later). Mind you I in no way, shape, or form profess to be a Renaissance man, or a worldly and all knowing sage, but I like to think I have basic common sense when it comes to certain things. As I have found out (the hard way), basic common sense is SK's major character flaw and a problem that sadly may damage his prospects in future relationships and worse, in any possible career aspirations. Once again, I am sure people can point out flaws in my character, but I was taught things at a young age (as most of us were) that have served me well over the years. As I have found out, SK was not taught these things and has no desire or inclination to learn them.

One such issue that comes to mind is the importance of getting one's drivers license. Now I understand that some people are late bloomers in life (as I was), but at some point (and I think someone that is 29 years of age should be PAST such a threshold) basic common sense SHOULD take over, and one realizes how much of an inconvience it is to have to constantly rely on others, or on public transportation to get places. I understand that some individuals have certain medical limitations that prevent them from getting a license, but SK has no such problems. When I have stated that not having adequate means of transportation may prevent or hinder his stated goal of a career in sales (as he has also been told by potential employers), he has requested that the subject be dropped and we not discuss it. Similarly, when I have offered to take him out (in my car) to teach him some basics of driving, my suggestion was also met with a request to table the discussion. It seems to me that these and other issues took on added importance to this story once SK's girlfriend came into the picture, who I will refer to as C.M.

( The preceeding was designed to serve as a backgound to this whole matter. In the interest of preventing this post from being too long and meandering I will in the the subsequent paragrphs, attempt to point out the exact occurences that led to the dissolution of mine and SK's friendship)

On or about January 13th, SK called me in a somewhat paniced state. Things had apparently deteriorated between him and his girlfriend. According to SK, things had gotten so bad and the issues between them so dire, that he wanted to leave and asked my advice on how to do so (SK detailed to me arguments the two had over money that were occuring with greater frequency every day). I advised him that if the situation was as desperate as he described then his only course of action should have been to leave. He stated that he would take my advice under consideration and that was how we left things. The next day he called me stating that he was leaving and that a "friend of his" , whom he knew from a club they both frequented, had "given him" a check for $1,200 to help SK get back on his feet financially. This story seemed very odd and possibly bordering on the untrue, but who was I to judge? At worst it was probably one of SK's white lies and nothing more. He seemed content so I left it at that.

Later that day a mutual friend of ours (Jimmy) asked if I had spoken to SK lately, and asked how he was doing. Judging by the fact that we seemed to be a tight knit group and did not hide anything from one another, I told Jimmy that it appeared that SK was breaking up with his girlfriend. That was really all that was discussed about the matter, and I figured this whole thing would probably blow over, SK would soon be back with C.M., and in a matter of days this whole thing would be a non-issue. It seemed I was right on the first two counts, but dead wrong on the third. Later on that weekend Jimmy and I met up with SK's sister at Good Times, and asked her if it was indeed true that SK had broken up with his girlfriend. SK's sister stated that she knew nothing about any possible friction between his brother and C.M, and further stated that they were indeed together. I saw this as further proof that whole thing had indeed blown over, if a problem between SK and his girlfriend even existed in the first place. Then Jimmy recieved a phone call.

On or about Martin Luther King Day, Jimmy called me on my cellphone to inform me that SK had left a message on his answering machine. As Jimmy played this message back for me, it was obvious that SK did not sound happy. To paraphrase, SK stated that "he knows that Jimmy heard a rumor that he and his girlfriend had broken up, but it was untrue." Again, I really thought nothing of this, and viewed it as conformation that everything was o.k, and all problems had been resolved. ( One might surmise by reading this that SK is a Drama King, and that observation is very much correct). As it turns out, I should have investigated this issue further, and for that I take responsiblity. I was getting the feeling that something was up, and to say that my "Bullshit Meter" was ringing would be an understatement.

We shall now fast forward to this past weekend. As of last Firday it had been almost two months since I had last spoken with SK. Jimmy and I again bumped into SK's sister, and inquired about how SK and his girlfriend were doing. This time his sister seemed distant and vauge, and gave curt, one or two word answers to our questions. "They are okay", is all that she would offer. Now the "Bullshit Meter" was blinking red. Once again I take responsiblilty for not calling SK right away and ask that we clear up any and all issues between us.

Early last Saturday evening, Jimmy called me at work and played for me a rambling diatribe of a message that SK left on Jimmy's house phone. In this message SK stated that he "knows the crap that Jimmy and I have been doing and saying behind his back", and "that is the reason that he has not been in contact with us in the last month and a half." Further, SK stated and I quote: "You are no longer welcome in our section of Goodtimes, and if you attempt to sit near us, I will have you thrown out by security." Interesting, I thought. In this soliloquy SK went on to say that he "tried to meet with us face to face at the last month's Pay-Per-View", but Jimmy and I "turned to leave" as we saw SK approaching. I also found this point to be interesting. Later that evening SK left another rambling message on my phone saying mostly the same thing as on Jimmy's message, but stating that he considered us to be no longer friends. Two times (once on Saturday, and again on Sunday) I tried to contact SK in a further attempt to clear things up, and to give my side of the story, but to no avail. I also sent him an E-Mail which has not been answered.

Some may view this as a shame, but I view it as a lesson learned, and an affirmation of the notion to focus on the important things in life. Over the past year my mother has been diagnosed with Cancer, and from this I have I have learned to worry about things I can control, and to surround myself with my TRUE FRIENDS, the ones who have been there with me over the years, through thick and thin ( I'm talking about you Smokin Steve). It is not that I don't value all of the friendships I have made, but I have many more important things going on in my life (and in the life of my loved ones), then to concern myself with a petty fight, involving someone's need for attention.

Further, I have neither the time, patience, nor inclination to get invloved in a 7th grade game of " he said, she said." Perhaps one day I will be able to meet SK and get his perspective on where things went wrong, but I am not going to go out of my way to try and find him. He knows where to find me, and the ball is in his court now. As I conclude this post I wash my hands of this issue, and will never again type another word about it in this space. The most valuable of life's lessons are often learned the hard way. As a History teacher of mine once said "We never stop learning in life..by not learning, one is not growing." Words to live by indeed.